humor

January 31, 2013

Live Theater Phobia

It is a struggle for me to watch live theater productions. I feel tense the whole time because I fear I will witness an actor seriously and obviously botching lines, and watch an uncomfortable struggle to get past the problem.  Something deeply disturbing about seeing the actors’ eyes signaling to each other while, with their mouths and bodies, the show goes on.

I don’t know why I have this fear. I go to live music all the time and never worry about performance glitches there. Maybe I had an abusive theater experience as a child.

Anyone else have this? Anybody?

January 22, 2013

Retirement Party Postponed…Indefinitely

So. When I was young I kept changing jobs and taking time off to do one thing or the other. I’d work on a novel. I’d do some traveling. I did a lot of worthwhile things and I pretended I agreed with Cary Grant’s character in HOLIDAY, who wants to have experiences while he is young then work later, after he discovers what he is working for.  (Pretended because I knew all along that what I wanted was simpler. I wanted to skip the day job thing entirely.)

I have friends and coworkers who chose less circuitous paths and a number of them have retired, or are considering it. So. I tried one of those on-line retirement calculators, and the results are in.  For the next decade, I only need to save 87% of my pay and then I will have enough saved to live at 22% of my current income level.  Of course if I could save 87% of my pay I probably wouldn’t need a retirement calculator.

Looking for a bright side – after living on 13% of my pay, my retirement income would really feel luxurious.

Overall, just one more indication that the kittens need to get jobs.