May 4, 2014

Sna-ap! Crack! Russstle…. Repeat!

In my yard, Spring is a time of great destruction. All manner of flying insects flit by to tease the cats. The insects escape into foliage, the cats go after them. Typically, the insects escape harm but the foliage does not.

I’m saying cats but the main culprit seems to be Leo, an excessively large feline:

Only great Dog knows what poor small creature Leo stalks here.

Leo’s personality spans the range between goofball and doofus. Except when an insect is nearby, he is the quintessential gentle giant:

Leo in foreground, another possible plant-murdering suspect, Arrow, behind him. Not yet trampled poppy in foreground.

Leo displaying his most common approach to life: jus’ chillin’. Not yet trampled poppy in foreground.

The other day I saw him body slam a sage to nab a grasshopper. The grasshopper popped away, and Leo shot through several feet of leaves in futile pursuit. He left behind a sage with snapped branches and a hole in its greenery:

Memorize the damage to this sage. You will soon be asked to tap this memory.

Hmmm, thought I, recalling the backyard wisteria. It is mostly dense lush green, now that it has finished blooming:

It is like a cave inside this thick wisteria.

However, there is one hole, with snapped limbs:

Does this remind you of any damaged plant you have recently viewed?

I had previously assumed that a bear had somehow entered my backyard and fallen into the wisteria, because several thick sturdy limbs are broken:

Bear(?) damage to the wisteria.

However, after the incident with the sage, Leo has become the prime suspect in the wisteria attack.

As always, even if he confesses, punishment will be out of the question. He is just too cute. Here he is cuddling with Luna:

If there exists a cuter cat picture, please comment me the link!

The WP Weekly Photo Challenge wants to see “Spring“.

January 28, 2014

An Orange Furry Tangle

The former kittens Bo and Leo can often be found sleeping in a jumble.

(The WP Weekly Photo Challenge wanted to see “juxtaposition”.)

January 25, 2014

Home Is Where The Thoughts Stay

What I see this morning as I write this.

I love meeting new places, and so I am excited to be heading out for a week of work-related travel; however, there’s a part of me that never wants to leave home, and thus I must always shove myself out the door.

There is nothing special about my house. It’s a tiny, nondescript box. I’m always behind with my housework and yard work and I no longer pretend that I intend to catch up. It would be charitable to call the furniture antiques. At one time I had lots of Nice Stuff but multiple moves, kids, pets, and my waning interest in Stuff have all taken a toll.

But of course, that’s not what matters.

Home is where my kids grew up (when we stopped moving around), and where they stay when they need a place to. Home is where we marked their growth spurts on the wall, and now have a funny paint job as we paint around but never over those growth marks.

Home is where the cats and the dog reside, usually doing something goofy. This morning, two of the cats did some play-fighting in the backyard, on opposite sides of a tree trunk. They rose up like bears and batted at each other left right left right but mostly hit the tree trunk.

Home is where I sit on a patio and write novels, and blog posts, while listening to the morning birds or the evening freeway traffic, which really can sound like the ocean.

Home is where I get to choose my changes, or have that illusion. Home is where I can dress however I please, except maybe when a kid walks in out of the bright afternoon sun with a friend and I’m still in my jammies. Home is where I ignore the phone’s ring if that’s what I feel like doing.

Home is where I recharge, revive, restore, and become ready to go back out in the world.

The curious thing is that home is so portable. I have had many homes – big, small, fancy, plain – and they all have the same effect. A house is a building, a home is the state of mind.

December 31, 2013

The Right Spot

Leo loves life and he makes the most of every moment. (Leo, teach me how!) When he wants to get petted, there is no ignoring him.

Pet me, please.

Oh yeah. That’s the spot.

I’m leaning my whole body into it.

I leaned too hard and I’m… slipping away. Oops. Don’t worry, I’ll come right back.

Here is a movie of the same session, with his mega-purr on the soundtrack. (More than one morning, he has awakened somebody in the household with that purr.) No need to watch the whole thing. Any ten second interval will give you the idea.

Years ago, a famous therapist pointed out that humans would be much healthier psychologically if we could ask for affection whenever we needed it – if we could mimic the cat who climbs into a lap as needed. I don’t remember the therapist’s name but I remember that observation whenever one of my cats shows up for a dose of affection.

(The WP Photo Challenge asked to see joy.)

December 27, 2013

They’re Lucky They’re So Cute

Some months ago, my daughter lost her laptop sleeve case. We searched and we searched. She decided she must have left it somewhere back at college rather than at home.

Cut to this morning: Mother and daughter thoroughly searching her bedroom because – in the middle of the night, of course – our former kittens had grabbed her favorite lip gloss and converted it to a toy, scrabbling and chasing it somewhere as yet undetected. During the futile search for the lip gloss, deep under the bed we found the laptop sleeve, which had also been converted to an objet de play.

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Our recent kittens are now 1 year old, but we still think of them as the babies, which serves them well at times like this.

The suspects (Bo, Leo, Arrow) when they truly were kittens.

They are bigger now and less likely to all three fit in the same sleep spot. Here are Bo and Leo.

Arrow, (almost) caught in the act of sharing the human’s breakfast.

December 26, 2013

Felines: No Two Alike!

I’ve known many cats through my life, and although they share important characteristics, each remains unique. I love them all and have been well- and long-trained to understand that cats are the master race!

Arrow (center) is incapable of moving slowly, and most photos of her are blurry.

Luna likes to lounge on a skylight – with difficulty, because the surface is convex. At some point, inevitably, he will relax too much and slide off.

Bop loves to help me with chores such as organizing paperwork.

Bo and Leo hang out together but could not be more different. For Bo, life seems a series of disappointments, while Leo is gratitude incarnate: he purrs when you touch him; he purrs when he eats; he purrs as he walks around.

The WP Photo Challenge wants to see “one”.

November 11, 2013

Rush Hour at the Cat Door

It is important to be the first one out in the morning. On this morning, Bo (orange, left) seems to have the advantage. He does not. As soon as the cat door opens, Arrow will squeeze under his chin and shoot outside before he takes a step.

On your mark!

I am a cat. I pace and meow to exit, and then, soon after, I return to lounge indoors. Sometimes the pacing lasts longer than the trip outdoors.

There are three cats here, one obscured by another's bushy tail.

There are three cats here, Arrow is obscured by Leo’s bushy tail.

Giant orange tabby Leo is usually third of the three to leave. He doesn’t get the fuss about the morning exits, but competes because his buds do.

Didn’t we just do this yesterday?

A rare photograph captures the exit of the usual winner. Arrow does everything at warp speed. This morning, the others haven’t yet realized the door is open by the time she is outside.

The others don't even know the door is open, yet.

If it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing fast.

P.S. to discerning blog readers – yes, these photos are missing two of the five cats. The youngsters use this cat door to the backyard. The oldsters prefer to leave by another door.

The oldsters avoid the youngsters at rush hour.

Oldsters Bop and Luna avoid the youngsters at rush hour.

(This week’s WordPress Photo Challenge wants to see habits.)

October 14, 2013

Dearest Blog, I Once Was Cool!

Dearest Blog,

I have neglected you of recent. Although I miss you, I cannot say why I’ve gone silent nor when it will end.

It was no fun to contemplate life without this big doofus.

Certainly, I have my reasons. First, I went away for a week of family reunions. By the time I got home, my special buddy, the enormous former kitten Leo, had gone missing, and the next 2.5 days I was in a terrible funk until I found him.

Next, I came down with a cold. It’s on the wane, thanks for asking. I’ve also found myself low on energy vis a vis the government shutdown. My day job paycheck is on furlough as I am a “non-essential” employee; and although it looks like eventually the lost pay will return to me, I don’t know when or how much. The cold and my furlough ennui are probably related. (My very personal response to this week’s Writing Challenge.)

Besides which, I found a tick! On me! Eeeewwww. Which led to hours with medicos, and an antiviral shot.

Meanwhile, I’ve been immersed in my first sit-down re-read of my newly completed fantasy-mystery novel FRAMES. At this stage, I don’t allow myself to make changes, I try to keep a more global perspective and make notes in margins about what needs to change. The goal is to read the whole book in as few sittings as possible.

Also meanwhile, I confess I’ve been struggling to limit the amount of time I spend reading Pete Townshend’s memoir: it’s kept me hooked through 400 pages so far.

More for the Strange World files. Now the visionary rebel Fela has become a Broadway musical.

Then, yesterday, when I thought I would finish my re-reading and reading, instead I got sucked into my son’s impromptu project to organize my record collection. He has recently laid long-term claim to my albums, but sought help organizing them. Alphabetical has never worked for me when it comes to browsing. So we spent many hours sorting into initial piles like R-&-B-rock-intersection or New-York-junkie-music. Some of the sorting stymied me. I mean where do you put Ike & Tina Turner? Sun Ra? Richard Thompson? Should the Blasters LPs stand alongside X because of historical context and abiding friendship, or next to David Lindley, another lover of roots guitar? Guess that’s how alphabetical listings got started…

It was great fun to give my son a few albums immediately. Turns out the 20 y.o.s are getting back into Joy Division, and I still don’t like ’em, so now my son is the proud owner of their first LP. (Mint condition, unlike the LPs I did like.) At one point I was rewarded when he said with bemusement, “Mom, it’s hard to say this but you used to be really cool.” Which reminded me of how I came to write SCAR JEWELRY.

September 15, 2013

Bag, Box, and Clubhouse

Warning: If you hate cute cat pix, stop reading now before you ruin your day.

Like all cats, the five in my household like to go inside stuff. It is the moments like these that persuade me to forgive them during times like these.

Here are Bop and Luna in a deep bag:

Bagful of cats.

The kittens often play in a long narrow box. Arrow also uses the box when it’s time for her meds:

Ever tried to drag a cat out of a 6 foot x 5 inch box?

Bo, Leo, and Arrow spend many hours in a mostly dead bush that has become their clubhouse:

Entrance to the Clubhouse

Can you spot Bo deep in the Clubhouse?

This is what one’s paws look like after a day in the Clubhouse:

Nothing is better than coming home filthy.

Few things are finer than coming home filthy.

Bop does about five times more cute stuff than any other cat I’ve known. This is likely related to her being such a jerk to the other cats. If she’s cute enough I won’t return her to the shelter? Hmm. May have worked so far. She likes to help me sort papers:

There. All arranged.

And in some situations she acknowledges the lowly human has the right idea:

PIllow and comforter enhance the nap experience.

A pIllow and comforter can enhance the nap experience.

For those of you who don’t know cats very well, an assurance: no cats were organized or arranged in the shooting of these photographs.

The Weekly Photo Challenge wants to see “Inside”.

August 27, 2013

Gee. Thanks guys.

Dear Family Cats (and also the dog),

Thanks for giving me an unforgettable experience. A night of induced insomnia and – okay – a couple laughs.

The perpetrators, Bop and Luna.

It all started about 130 am. The dog woke me up, walking in and out of my room, flopping down in the hallway, jumping up again to tick tick tick tick another circuit of my room. When she walks at a certain pace, her nails on the floor sound like the Sixty Minutes clock. At 130 pm, I find this charming.

After a moment of consciousness, I heard what had made the dog restless. Cat fight, a couple houses away. I recognized the voice of my beloved Luna, whom I had failed to lock inside. I keep the cats in at night (coyotes), but on hot summer nights Luna often evades capture.

Luna is 10 years old and I had never heard him fight before. He is a peaceable fellow who gets along with most other cats. The part of my brain that was awake decided it was a good idea to break up the fight. I filled a glass with water and headed down the street. No noise, no cats. Okay. I dumped the water and returned to bed.

Turn out my light, cue the fight, which resumed a few feet outside my window. Refill the water glass, take it outside, toss water at the cats. The other cat ran north. Luna headed west, stopped, stared at me, then sprinted after the other cat. Jerk.

The really!-I’m-mean-and-I’m-going-to-hurt-you! howling resumed in the backyard. By now I was too invested to shrug and lie in the dark listening to fake loud cat aggression. In the backyard, I decided to turn the hose on them. I turned the hose on full bore and I blasted them —

— with a dribble of water. Oh. The hose had kinked.

While I worked on unkinking the hose, from the house behind ours came brutal THUNK-thunk-THUNKs as the pit bull tried to slam his way outside through a closed dog door. He wanted in on the cat fight.

Suddenly I realized that what I needed was to be asleep. I left the hose and returned to bed. Where I lay, very very awake, for 3 hours. As many of you know, time expands at night and those 3 hours lasted for days.

I finally drifted off to sleep shortly before dawn. Not long afterwards, I jolted awake to shrill cat screeches. For the first time, our cat Bop had ambushed the kittens during the night, which is usually a time of truce. Perhaps Luna had inspired her.

There we were, stumbling into the hall, squinting at the lights we each turned on: my daughter and I, armed with water bottles, looking to spray Bop for messing with a kitten.

A peacekeeper.

Actually the “kittens” are now 11 months old and two of them are bigger than Bop, but she knows how to bully and they will always consider her enormous.

Recent runt kitten Leo stands outside window and watches his hero Luna snooze. Leo doesn’t realize he has grown up to be the biggest cat in the neighborhood.

Now the dog was energized. With two humans out of bed, it must be breakfast time.

Have you ever gone for a walk just after dawn? It is such a peaceful time of day.

P.S. As I write this, Bop has knocked the DSL modem to the floor. Twice. So we’ll see whether this exposé ever gets posted.

(This post responds to today’s Daily Prompt, “I’d Like to Thank My Cats”.)

Required Writing

Just about anything by Sue Perry

cats